GROOVYHUSTLER:
Maria is one hot lady.
ROCHESTER grunts.
GROOVYHUSTLER:
She's a walking wet dream.
PAPAKASS:
I love Maria. We are good friends.
MEMYSELFANDIRE:
Ok!?
PAPAKASS:
Maria and my wife are very close.
GROOVYHUSTLER:
You're lucky PA.
PAPAKASS:
Yes, I love Katerina.
GROOVYHUSTLER:
In a platonic sense, of course.
Bits of Babel: Lady Love
Bits of Babel: Mind Over Matter
ROCHESTER roams the virtual playground
aimlessly.
ROLLINGTHUNDER:
Hey, Roch.
SILICONVISION shouts I think therefore I am ...
CHRISTIANTHELIONESS:
Ah, but how do you know you think?
Descartes got it all wrong.
ENESTO:
The things I would do with Maria ...
ROCHESTER:
?
ENESTO shivers.
CHRISTIANTHELIONESS:
He got quite a few things wrong, actually.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
So did Plato.
CHRISTIANTHELIONESS:
Absolutely. Plato got so much wrong it's
hard to see the things he got right.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
Thinking just ain't enough to get the job
done. You've got to add science.
Bits of Babel: Erroneous Elders
PAPAKASS shouts Soon ROGERRABBIT will
be on and this yelling will stop.
CHRISTIANTHELIONESS:
How does RogerRabbit silence people, PA?
MEMYSELFANDIRE:
Shall we dance?
CHRISTIANTHELIONESS:
Oh yeah.
WORKORCHESS drops his pants.
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts You can say prior
philosophers got such and such wrong or
you can say the discussion kept the
conversation going until such and such
got it right.
MEMYSELFANDIRE:
What's your Halloween costume going to
be this year ?
CHRISTIANTHELIONESS:
Either way, Groovy.
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts A tautology?
CHRISTIANTHELIONESS shouts But I'm talking
about things they got wrong when it would
have been possible for them to get NOT so
wrong.
ROCHESTER will be a construction worker on
Halloween. Oh, I am one every other weekday,
haha.
CHRISTIANTHELIONESS shouts That is, not
necessarily, or, only because of a lack
of knowledge.
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts Yup.
MEMYSELFANDIRE:
Rochester YMCA?
ROCHESTER:
?
FISTSOFFORCEFULFURY:
I will be a mean wicked mother who tells
her kids what to do.
MEMYSELFANDIRE:
I'll be the Indian.
ROCHESTER shouts Oh I get it now.
MEMYSELFANDIRE:
Cool. So you've already saved on the hat.
Bits of Babel: Kiss The Girls And Make Them Cry
CHRISTIANTHELIONESS shouts For instance, Descartes said
that animals had no feelings whatsoever, no emotional
states. That statement is largely as defensible today as
it was in his time, because you can never prove that
anyone besides yourself has feelings.
ROCHESTER was trying to be funny; construction is my
everyday job.
CHRISTIANTHELIONESS shouts But even in his day there
were enough people who had more common sense than that.
CAPTAINMURPH shouts Hello I am Chekenyere, I am from
Bangalor, India. We have a goat. I am named after the
goat. The goat died.
FISTSOFFORCEFULFURY:
Hey Rochester.
ROCHESTER shouts Hey FOFF.
FISTSOFFORCEFULFURY shouts Can I ask you a professional
question?
ROCHESTER shouts Sure.
FISTSOFFORCEFULFURY:
In a personal manner so I do not appear stupid and/or
bore people?
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts If I make you cry.
ROCHESTER shouts Go for it.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts That's proof you feel.
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts But can you make a cat cry?
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts No.
MACDEITERMYERS:
Descartes was trying to be funny.
CHRISTIANTHELIONESS shouts Ha, you think MacD?
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts I prefer trying to make
the pussy happy.
CAPTAINMURPH:
To make it cry tell it the sad, sad story of your
childhood, which led to your current chess addiction.
NACHOS shouts Humans were created for a purpose.
Bits of Babel: War of Words and Unspent Hate ...
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts I studied Philosophy with Ed Gettier at the local university. He supposedly debunked Plato's Theory
of Knowledge in a 3 page paper in 1963. I must say he was a sharp cat.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts It took until 1963? That's odd.
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts You can read it if you search the
net, I guess, it's a very good read.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts That realization may come without
philosophical guidance. It's called logic.
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts He was a Logic teacher.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts You can teach logic?
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts That's what they said.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts You're mad.
SILICONVISION doesn't believe in Logic.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts Education gives you powers of
logic. Logic doesn't give you education.
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts We had our own special language.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts Me too.
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts You need it to analyze.
CAPTAINMURPH shouts I teach ninjitsu to children with
learning disabilities.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts That's noble.
ZANA shouts Logic is a course offered in many liberal
arts colleges.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts Yes, I know. What a load of
rubbish.
ZANA shouts P or not P.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts No P.
TINIEL:
I have the heart of a liberal ...
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts I did however take all the logic
courses they offered.
TINIEL:
... in a jar on my desk.
Bits of Babel: Yesterday's Future
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts Labels don't usually
stick, unless they're political ones and aimed
at an American.
CAPTAINMURPH shouts During the Korean War I was
a clerk in a small M*A*S*H unit. Everyone there
called me Radar. I once sent a jeep home to my
parents one piece at a time. Oh those were the
days!
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts Modal Logic was cool.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts Why did they call you Radar?
Didn't the tv show start 20 years after the war
finished?
CAPTAINMURPH shouts Because I always just sort of
knew what was going to happen before it happened.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts My bad or yours?
CAPTAINMURPH shouts Like when Colonel Blake was
about to talk I would answer his question before
he said it-- so they called me Radar.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts Ohh. Fitting.
ZANA shouts Never denies anything.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts What do they call you now?
CAPTAINMURPH shouts Now they call me Master at
the dojo when I teach ninjitsu to children with
learning disabilities. Usually it sounds like
"Mathtoo," but that's OK, they'll improve.
TINIEL shouts I hate lag!!
ZANA shouts Needs more Nodes per Seconds in its
algorithm ...
Bits of Babel: Dream Of A Common Language!?
ROCHESTER greets his fellow ROCHESTERIANS.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
Hello. How's your part of the world?
LOVELACE:
38. I retire in 10 years.
FELINEFINE:
Hello to everyone from Santiago de Cuba,
Cuba ... ;0)
ROCHESTER:
Felino!
FELINEFINE:
Roch!!
CAPTAINMURPH:
Hi, Felino.
FELINEFINE:
Hi, Cap.
CAPTMURPH high-fives Felino.
FELINEFINE:
High-fives?
CAPTMURPH:
Yeah, like a handshake, but informal.
FELINEFINE:
Good!!!! High-five then ... ;0)
Bits of Babel: Gin Blossoms
GRANDMASTERCHESSNERD:
Greetings fellow nerds.
BOOKOFCHESS:
Dunno, is this book? ;o)
JAHBONE hugs Anna.
PAPAKASS shouts Anna!!
GRANDMASTERCHESSNERD:
This is a good pickup line. The only thing
sexier than Anna (by the way I'm talking to
Anna) is ...
GOODDAY has trouble with thinking of anything
that is not sexier than Anna.
VAPORLOK:
How do you know Anna doesn't look like an
Orangutan?
GRANDMASTERCHESSNERD:
Cause I met her! Ouch, and we had a good time.
MEMYSELFANDIRE:
Orangutans can be sexy.
BOOKOFCHESS shouts Fight or you will die book.
I'm not a genius you know, just a drunk.
CAPTAINMURPH shouts Hello, I am connecting magically
from Heaven. God is here. Everything looks all right.
Carry on.
FICKLEPHARAOH shouts OK. Thanks God.
Bits of Babel: Money Making Machine .... Oh Money, Oh Money Making Machine ...
LIPSYNC:
Wait a minute ... smells like ... just a second ...
FICKLEPHARAOH:
Teen spirit.
LIPSYNC:
Something going on ...
FICKLEPHARAOH:
At your local casino.
LIPSYNC:
No way.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
Wait for the US Dollar to drop more. Won't take long.
You live and learn. Is that Lippy? Nice shade.
DIGITAL VISION:
Speculating in dollars now is not bad for you.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
Investing in them is.
LIPSYNC:
Dollars are weak.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
Swiss, even Canadian, haha.
LIPSYNC:
Money is for suckers.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
Luxury is not wanting luxuries.
GOODWILLHUNTING:
Right on!
Bits of Babel: Broken Galaxies
LIPSYNC:
Life is short, live quietly and leave.
Don't think about it too deeply.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
Ok. Phew. I was getting stuck.
LIPSYNC:
I know, it's an infinite loop, a mobius
strip wrapped around a quantum singularity.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
If you reverse the polarity.
LIPSYNC:
Whoa! You don't want to do that.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
The axis might shift. Big no-no.
THEMATHWIZ:
I'm surrounded by morons.
LIPSYNC:
The retards have escaped!
CAPTAINMURPH:
I learned about Newton's Theorem the other day.
THEMATHWIZ:
George Bush made it out W-WAY before you guys.
CAPTAINMURPH:
It says the degree of an equation equals the
number of solutions it has. I thought that was
pretty interesting.
THEMATHWIZ:
That isn't Newton's Theorem.
CAPTAINMURPH:
Oh !?
MACHONE:
Love is war!
THEMATHWIZ:
Names for theorems are stupid.
CAPTAINMURPH:
Yeah ... haha ... I think it's Newton's theorem though.
Bits of Babel: To The Faithful Departed ...
LIPSYNC:
Dead people don't have theorems. It's ours now.
WINOFOREVER:
That's got nothing to do with Newton. That was way
before his time. It's called the basic principle of
Mathematics. An equation with n degrees has n solutions.
CAPTAINMURPH:
Yeah ;0)
LIPSYNC:
Dead people have left everything behind.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
We stand on the shoulders of giants.
KING'SPROPHET:
Bah ... not me man ... I did it ALL by myself.
LIPSYNC:
Dead people ... we stand on dead people.
WINOFOREVER:
Basically you can convert any equation of n degrees
to the general form of (x-a)(x-b) ... (x-n)=0 and it
will have n roots.
FICKLEPHARAOH:
Ok.
CAPTAINMURPH:
We're getting to that soon ... I'm doing pre-calculus and
calculus all over again because it's been so long. Gonna
get into electronics and nanotechnology.
WINOFOREVER:
If you want more explanations from me I'd be glad to
help. But not at the moment ... send me a message next
time.
CAPTAINMURPH:
All right. Hehe.
BOOKOFCHESS:
Anyone wanna argue?
CAPTAINMURPH:
No, we like you too much.
Bits of Babel: Rolling Thunder Revue
ROLLINGTHUNDER:
Good evening Martians!
GUMBLE:
This isn't the lively place it usually is.
That's because Colorado lost.
ROLLINGTHUNDER:
The Rockies are a bunch of losers!
GUMBLE:
Boston is a group of over priced air heads!
IMMACULATELYFRIGHTFUL:
Kabooooooooooooooooom!
ROLLINGTHUNDER shouts Haha, so easy!
FIGARO:
Do students from The Experience do well here?
RAYRENO:
Most definitely, if my performance is anything
to go by.
ROLLINGTHUNDER:
RayReno for Mayor!
FIGARO:
So, it must be an effective resource for sure.
RAYRENO:
As sure as breath and taxes.
FIGARO:
Thanks.
Bits of Babel: Castles In The Sky
ROLLINGTHUNDER:
RayReno for Mayor!
RAYRENO shouts Thanks!
ROLLINGTHUNDER:
Mayor of a rundown town ... ;0)
GUMBLE shouts BARTER TOWN! Two men enter ...
IMMACULATELYFRIGHTFUL:
I am Russian and I drink
RAYRENO:
Got ulcers?
GUMBLE shouts Cold vodka NOW!
RAYRENO:
I'll give you water tonic.
ROLLINGTHUNDER:
You're the mayor, not the town bartender!
ACHINGGAIN:
To the world you are just somebody, but to
somebody you're the whole world ...
Bits of Babel: Drifting Satellite
NIMZOWITCH has arrived!
ROLLINGTHUNDER shouts So?
NIMZOWITCH:
How are things in the People's Republic Roll?
ROLLINGTHUNDER:
I don't live in Taiwan.
NIMZOWITCH shouts I meant the Mainland,
if I'd meant Taiwan I would have said
Taiwan.
GUMBLE shouts Na zdorovia.
NIMZOWITCH shouts ... tovaritch.
GUMBLE shouts For more than one?
NIMZOWITCH slides a |_|D down the bar to GUMBLE.
GUMBLE shouts Skoal for the Danish ...
ROLLINGTHUNDER shouts I told you I don't live in
Taiwan!!!
GUMBLE notes that it has ... ve-ry li-ttl-e e-fffect ...
(snore).
Bits of Babel: Annie Get Your Gun
ANNIEGETYOURGUN:
Taiwan is a repressive regime.
NIMZOWITCH shouts Taiwan is repressive?
I don't think so. How about them Commies
on the mainland?
SKONK:
The Taiwanese make good bikes.
ANNIEGETYOURGUN:
Not any better. I agree.
GUMBLE shouts They both make defective
stuff to sell to us rich Americans ...
NIMZOWITCH shouts They execute more people
every year than all other nations combined.
Also, they sample their intended prey for
organs, with the hope of capitalizing on
desperate transplant tourists. Hang, harvest,
dispatch to family. Yeah baby!
SKONK:
What defective Taiwanese stuff have you bought
lately?
NIMZOWITCH shouts Nothing. All of it is first
class.
CUBBY shouts C'mon Nitwit. We execute people
because we like to and think it's good clean
fun. We'd do it for free if we had to.
ANNIEGETYOURGUN:
It's amazing Skonk is even permitted to play
here. He has a habit of aborting games he's
losing.
CUBBY shouts Him and a few thousand others ...
if what you say about him is true.
GUMBLE shouts What country locks up more of
its people in prison than any other?
ANNIEGETYOURGUN:
Oh it's true all right, is it that bad a
problem? I'm relatively new here.
CUBBY shouts Good ole USA!
Bits of Babel: We, the People ...
ALFREDQUACKK:
Hi all!
CUBBY shouts ANNIEGETYOURGUN, there really
is no good solution to that problem. It's just part
of the virtual chess landscape.
RONJEREMIAH shouts Yes, a country that keeps
claiming to be "free."
IMMACULATELYFRIGHTFUL shouts Muhahahahaha-
hahahahaha.
ALFREDQUACKK:
Alo!?
CUBBY shouts Free for sure. No charge for your
execution, and you get a free meal to boot.
ALFREDQUACKK shouts Hello!
ANNIEGETYOURGUN:
Too bad. You would think people have some class
or honor or both.
ALFREDQUACKK:
???
COPPERWINDOW notes that RONJEREMIAH thinks NOSTORM
is voluminous ...
CUBBY shouts My idea to improve this site's cash
flow is to have live executions right here. Sort
of an iron cage match, pay per view.
READYTOROLL is here!
IMMACULATELYFRIGHTFUL:
Anna!
ALFREDQUACKK:
Wanna play?
GUMBLE shouts I like America! That does not mean that I
like all of the trade policies ... Our trade deficit is
shameful!
IMMACULATELYFRIGHTFUL:
Kabooooooooooooooooom!
So e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-easy!
SISTERMANUEL shouts God bless you all!
RICALCULOUS:
Need a Sugar Momma to take me all the way to the peek
of the rating mountain.
IMMACULATELYFRIGHTFUL shouts Muhahahahahaha
GUMBLE shouts IMMACULATELYFRIGHTFUL has a few less
"hahas" this time. Maybe he's not so sure?
Bits of Babel: In Medias Res
ROGERRABBIT:
How's that production coming along, Mel?
MELBEE:
It's a pain, but the footage is fantastic.
ROGERRABBIT:
When will it hit the box office?
MELBEE:
Maybe never. It's an indy project that'll
probably go straight to video, but we can
always hope.
ROGERRABBIT:
Of course!
MELBEE:
In Medias Res, for those interested.
GROOVYHUSTLER:
They're shooting an indy film down the street.
MELBEE:
Is it any good?
ROGERRABBIT:
Looks awesome!
Bits of Babel: Devious Devising
TRIXIE:
Help, I'm being abused!
POWERPUFF:
What's happening?
TRIXIE:
I keep getting abort offers from my opponent
even though I'm one move away from check-
mating him.
POWERPUFF:
Decline them.
TRIXIE:
He's now telling me I have to wait for 15 minutes
if I want to claim a win.
POWERPUFF:
Is that the amount of time left on the clock?
TRIXIE:
Yes, more or less.
POWERPUFF:
Make the move that would lead to mate and walk
away from the computer.
TRIXIE:
How do I do that, given it's his turn to play?
POWERPUFF:
I don't know what else to tell you. Which interface
do you have?
TRIXIE:
A derivative of Chess Client for a Palm Treo Phone.
DEPUTYDOGG:
Add him to your list of "players to avoid"
and then move on.
ROGERRABBIT:
That's not so easy, Deputy.
Bits of Babel: Cemetry of Mind
GROOVYHUSTLER:
There's a guy playing a game right now
whose name is "Gomakeyourself."
ROGERRABBIT gasps.
GROOVYHUSTLER:
If he can use such a handle, why can't I?
ROGERRABBIT:
Good question.
TRIXIE:
All right then, I guess I'm waiting.
GROOVYHUSTLER:
I'd get muzzled for sure, in a New York
second! That's pretty quick in case you
don't know.
ROGERRABBIT:
Yuppa Doodle! It also depends on who's
on duty and what mood they're in.
GROOVYHUSTLER:
Yeah, I'd probably cut some slack too.
ROGERRABBIT greets KINGKREOLE!
GROOVYHUSTLER:
Unless I was cranked off.
KINGKREOLE!:
Hey Roger.
GROOVYHUSTLER shouts Today I was a
spoilsport and I don't even feel bad.
That's when you know you're getting old.
Bits of Babel: Check Is In The Mail
MELBEE:
Hey KingKreole!, is it true what they were
saying about you and Angelina Jolie?
KINGKREOLE!:
Hehe.
TRIXIE:
Well, his handle is ChexxMexx if anyone wants
to know. At least I can publicly excoriate him.
TRIXIE:
CHEXXMEXX DOESN'T PLAY FAIR!
CHEXXMEXX:
Come now, I didn't do anything wrong. If it
makes you happy, I RESIGN!
MELBEE:
Please don't make public accusations of abuse.
GORGON:
Promptly take your rigmarole elsewhere!
TRIXIE:
I was just responding to ChexxMexx's private
insults. Bye ...
Bits of Babel: Renegade Priests
ROGERRABBIT:
Laugh out loud! RrrharRrrhar!
SIZZLINGSARAH:
E-Man, as a transvestite, why don't you have
more compassion for minority groups?
MELBEE:
Was that "RrrharRrrhar" in good Ol'Uncle
Banana style or was it just a "RrrharRrrhar."
ROGERRABBIT:
It was both, Mel.
ROGERRABBIT goes for another sandwich.
DEPUTYDOGG:
Laugh out loud: For Your Viewing Pleasure!
MELBEE:
That may well have been the gayest stuff
I've ever seen. Thanks for sharing.
DEPUTYDOGG:
No problem.
DIGITALVISION:
Hehe. They managed to make a show out of a
hazy subject matter.
LEAPINGLIZZARDS:
I prefer this version: For Your Eyes Only!
DIGITALVISION:
Haha! But he doesn't get beat up by a stick.
DEPUTYDOGG:
Where can I get a costume like that?
DIGITALVISION:
By paying you money?
DEPUTYDOGG:
Hmmm.
DIGITALVISION:
Don't mind me I just hope I die in a good way.
DEPUTYDOGG:
It might as well be terribly painful. I'm a pessimist,
so I'll hope for the best.
Bits of Babel: Purple Haze
MODESTTMOUSE:
Does anyone know where I can find a quality online
openings resource?
ROGERRABBIT:
I know exactly what you need, and that's the one
and only ChessCoach Experience!
LULULELIP:
Have you seen the Coach yet, Mr Mouse?
MODESTTMOUSE:
Wow! Amazing and useful stuff! Thanks!
LULULELIP:
Glad to be of help.
Bits of Babel: What's New Pussycat !?
DIGITALVISION greets the still enormous ROGERRABBIT.
ROGERRABBIT:
Haha! Hey Digital.
TRUDITRU:
Hi Roger! You been hiding in the corner?
DIGITALVISION:
Hey.
ROGERRABBIT:
Didn't even know you were there Trudi. I've been away.
LOL. I'm not hiding.
TRUDITRU:
Ahh! I've been here and there ... my critters want in
...want out...want in ...want out ... haha!
ROGERRABBIT:
This one cat follows me everywhere. Drives me nuts
sometimes.
TRUDITRU:
He loves you Roger.
HEROHIT-O:
Hey Roger, never complain about a little pussy following
you around.
TRUDITRU:
He also wants your food.
ROGERRABBIT:
She, Trudi.
TRUDITRU:
She loves you then ;0) Here kitty kitty, hehe.
ROGERRABBIT:
I made the mistake of giving it table scraps and the
rest is history. She's not even my cat.
TRUDITRU:
They know a soft touch when they see it.
ROGERRABBIT:
Yeah. Be right back.
TRUDITRU:
You're just a lovable person and she knows it.
ROGERRABBIT:
Yeah that's true Trudi ;0) Gotta step away for a bit,
brb.
PA'SPRODIGY shouts I guess that extrapolates into watch
out for the big pussies?
KLICKETTYKLANG:
Who are you shouting to?
PA'SPRODIGY:
HEROHIT-O, I guess that extrapolates into watch out for
the big pussies?
Bits of Babel: Intellectual Flare-Ups
TRABOR:
Hello my flock!
JUMPINGJACKFLASH:
Good evening one and all! How goes it?
TRUDITRU shouts Hi Flash!
TRABOR:
You all suck at chess I know. How many dots
are in "idiot"?
LULULELIP:
Yes, Trabor, that's why we're here.
LIPSYNC:
Since I'm already an idiot it's three. Three dots
at least, right?
TRABOR:
Yes.
LIPSYNC:
I'm happy now.
TRABOR:
Rightly so.
LULULELIP:
You're a genius Lipsync.
LIPSYNC:
I guess I am. Feels great. Thank you all and
good night!
LULULELIP:
Please explain to us idiots, in slow and simple
words, how such Einstein flashes dawn on you
so easily!
LIPSYNC:
It's a secret only non-idiots may know.
TRABOR:
LOL! IDIOT=i+dot+i! Got it?
LULULELIP:
But the second "i" in "idiot" ruins your solution.
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